The Growing Urge to become a Mother someday

I was never the kind of adolescent that cooed over little babies. I admired them for what they were but I was not really one for wanting to hold them.  It was during my time as a missionary in a family ward in Arizona that I actually took a real liking to little children. I actually started to feel like I was warming to the idea of one day becoming a mother.  It’s not that prior to this time in my life I didn’t want to be a mother, I just felt that it was all way too far away to give it much deep thought.  In saying this though, I had the name ‘Nyah’ chosen as a potential daughter’s name after watching the movie ‘Mission Impossible 2’ when I was about 19 years of age.

I got married in December of 2004 to my best friend.  Our courtship was unusual compared to that of our peers.  Jim and I had been good friends for a while but although I thought he was wonderful to be around, he did not share the same faith as me.  To take things any further was pretty much out of the question as far as I was concerned.  It was around the time that I received my call to serve as a full-time missionary for my church that Jim and I started dating seriously.  Our brief Summer together in 2002 was wonderful.  It felt like everything I had imagined falling in love would feel like.  We laughed ALL the time and at silly things.  Everything in the world was wonderful.  The sun was shining, the birds were chirping and everything around us smelled sweet.  I remember lying awake at night, my face aching from smiling so much.  I parted for Salt Lake City, Utah in January of 2003 with certainty that I would marry that young man when I returned, but uncertainty of how it would all piece together. One thing I did know was that the Lord wanted me to serve a mission.

Both Jim and I did much changing over the 18 months that I was overseas.  We wrote each other every week without fail and each letter I received from him are pieces of his growing testimony of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.  We grew in love for each other and our love of the gospel.  Jim was baptised in December of 2003 and we were married in the Brisbane Australia temple for time and all eternity the following December.

It was amazing how the Lord had brought the two of us together. Still today I am in awe at how Heavenly Father provided such a wonderful companion for me.

A few months prior to our marriage, Jim and I made plans together.  We made record of things that we wanted to achieve in our lives together.  One of those things was to travel the world.  Given that we both planned on having a large family someday, we realised the reality of that happening once we started that family.  We therefore decided that the best time to travel the world was soon after we tied the knot as husband and wife.  Thus began our journey to 21 countries throughout the world together in the year of 2005 (www.jkadventures.blogspot.com).

The desire I once had of becoming a mother, soon turned into a nagging urge.  This, during our first year of marriage as we travelled the world on a shoe string.